Smashed fingers

Having a smashed index finger does make one appreciate the work it does to type.  While it isn't broken, it does make writing anything... interesting.  My poor right middle finger is work triple time.  I think I will write on my phone since my thumb does all the swiping.  I will be flirting with first person.  I think it will be easier for the reader to relate to the Character that way.

Lame Nightmares

When people think of nightmares, I think they think of running away from clowns, unseen monsters, and a general sense of fear and foreboding.  I wish to God I had those sort of nightmares more often, since I find them adventurous.  Instead I get nightmares like being late to work.  I don't even view public nudity as a nightmare, usually because I'm the only one that notices I'm naked.  Other than being fat and having some serious big tummy issues, I get on OK with being naked, but being late?

Heaven help me I can't stand being late to work.  Nothing gives me more anxiety.

I think "Oh, God, I'm going to get written up.  My boss is going to be so disappointed in me.  My co-worker is probably starving right now."  Of course, this time I find myself living in this townhouse.  It's totally attached and a corner home.  It's actually nice, like, really nice.  (I had a lot of dreams that I was crazy rich all night, or at least my folks were.)  It was the sort of place you'd drool over in House Hunters or Property Virgins.  But, the night before I had to park a little farther away from the house and then my car was gone.  I was already 40 minutes late for work, and I find that my car has been towed.

Horrible.  I thought I was going to lose it.

Which is kind of odd, since if I'm going to be late for work I just call out.  Rather use sick time than be at work and still get written up.  Yes, I am that sort of person.

I also had a dream that a bunch of stuff fell on my neck that I had to categorize, but that was just Rascal kicking me in the neck.  So not cool.

I decided that I am going to tear up the Mary Sue LitmusTest later.  Should be fun.  And by later I mean I'm going to do some of it today.

Goodbye 240's

Good bye 240's.  I hope to never see you ever again.  You can stay lost, even outside of my memory.  If we ever meet again, it will be too soon.

After I stepped on the scale this morning I felt motivated.  Motivated to what, you might ask?  Walk the dogs.  I took the mongrel and the mongrelette for a walk.  They enjoyed it and Rascal is now pretending that she's tired.  I know she wasn't tired while we were walking.  That dog could walk for hours with a doggy backpack and never slow down.  It's Scoundrel I worry about.  He gets tired so quickly and he wanted to pee and poop on everything.  I'm glad he listens when I tell him no.  The marking everything isn't so bad, but I don't want him leaving pitbull sized turds all over my neighbor's yards.

I am making breakfast right now.  Letting the onions cook as I type.  Then I'm going to throw in half the stuff I have in the house with some spinach and green beans.  It will probably serve as the base for our breakfast for the next few days.  We're limited to whatever we have in the house due to being in the hole after paying all our bills.  Well, at least until Thursday.  I am thinking of putting $125 onto a gift card a week to serve as our weekly food budget.  This would include, of course, drinks (read water) and stuff for work.  I try and bring my lunch everyday, and other than having nothing to bring the other day I have done very well.

I have a vacation coming up, and it's probably going to be filled with cooking and writing.  I've been feeling inspired.  For reasons unknown, every time I read any feminist literature I am driven to write my novel.  I think it's because I am writing my own female power fantasy.  I can already hear the critics now... oh well.  

The Busy Bee

Man, it has been a crazy past few weeks for me.  Dogs, gaming, baby, work, cooking, minecraft, and most importantly: Sleeping.  Other than being dead broke after all our bills fell on us at once (and we get paid throughout the month one week at a time), things are going all right.  Despite not being a 100% paleo type of gal, I have continued to lose weight, albeit much slower than I did the few couple of weeks.

What I am most excited about and what I just can't get over is that my nails have never looked better since I laid off the dairy.  Now, I can't say that I have been 100% strict on the no dairy, but if I can't get the high quality stuff I just go without.  Anyway, since I stopped drinking the conventional stuff at your average grocer, all the white blemishes on my nails have gone away.  I'm not really sure what else to call them.  But, you probably had them a time or two in your life.  Well, I always had one somewhere.  As soon as one started to make its way to being cut off, I would inevitably produce another one.  At one point all of my nails had these strange, white marks.  Now I don't have a single one.  I even flicked them on the edge of something hard to see if they would form and nothing.

So, that's exciting for me.  Apparently I have gotten all that I need from the kale, broccoli, and other veggies I have been eating like an addict.

I think I might change the name of this blog to something a bit more open.  I mean, I was really fired up about changing my lifestyle when it happened, but I'm a busy woman and there are so many other things I love to do.  I write, game, raise a kid, and tend to my perpetual canine toddlers.  I like to spend time with my parents and now my little brother is going to be a dad soon (barring sad events anyway).  While I might not be happy about the circumstances, I am excited to be an aunt again, and I'm excited that my future niece or nephew will be close by for me get to know and to be a cousin to my little angel.  I'm also going to be "adopting" his two future stepsons as my nephews, and that makes me happy as well.  They're good kids and I hope to see more of them.

So, my diet isn't the most important thing about me.  I've lost that fired up, evangelical passion that I had when I first started.  I mean, I still get pretty ticked off when people go on and on about moderation just because they can stuff their faces with anything and everything and still be rail thin, but the reality for me is that I can't.  I mean, I'm not 100% because I live in a food desert, and what I can get is insanely expensive.  It's great that the paleo big names can talk about "Trader Joes", whatever the hell that is (I know it's a grocery store of some sort, but I've never seen one) or Cosco, Costco.. anyway, never seen one and the closest wholefoods is an hour away.  I don't drive to Austin unless I'm visiting my best friend, and I'd rather go to Central Market since the company I work for owns it and I can get a discount if I shop smart.  I substitute things.  My cheat is the lean pork sausage that my company sells.  Yeah, it has some sugar in it, but since I'm not eating twinkies I'm not too concerned right now.  I'm not going to sweat sugar in my bacon either.  I've decided that I just can't so I won't.

I wish I could afford to be obsessed with food quality, but it isn't in the cards.

However, if I finish writing my and it takes off I just might be able to one day.